Spikes slumped up against a tree at the park she had found herself in.
It was almost a blur, ten tests later and she finally believed she was pregnant, grabbing her keys, running out of the house, and worst of all forgetting to leave a note.
“He is going to be so mad...” she sighed bringing her knees to her chest.
“No, no he’s not...not if I tell him about this.” she leaned her head back against the tree closing her eyes. She could feel the familiar threat of tears forming as her mind was consumed by the decision she had to make.
I could always take care of it and not let anyone know.
Her thoughts raced, her hands began to tingle as she felt the air around her almost cease.
I’m not ready to be a mother. I’ll never be ready.
She felt like she was spinning downward into an alternate world, her heart feeling like it was going to explode out of her chest.
I know I’ll fail...
She was surrounded by darkness, hugging her knees, trapped in her own head with every worst case scenario playing on repeat.
“Mommy!” The darkness was gone, and glimpses of a life she had yet to know played before her eyes like fast forwarding a film.
Okay....I’ve gone insane...
The flashes stopped and slowed as an image of a small girl with silver hair showed. The little girl spun around, smiling up at Spikes with ice eyes, and seemed to be reaching for her hand.
“I love you Mommy!”
Spikes shot her head up and she was back in the park, she looked around seeing the sun had already gone down. She brought her hand to her forehead, wiping off the sweat, her body still shaking.
“Was that...was that you baby...” she whispered, hesitantly resting her hand on her stomach. Her heart jumped when she made contact, heart still racing.
“How did you...nevermind, stupid question, I have to remember what I can do...” she looked around for people, feeling slight relief that no one was there to hear her talking to herself.
Brushing off her pants she made her way back to her jeep, set to head home.
“I don’t think I can say goodbye to you after that baby.” she whispered, driving through the city to get home. “But I’m still fucking terrified, but...your grandma told me that it’s okay to be afraid, and that your Daddy will always be there for me when I’m afraid.”
She paused feeling her lips curl into a smile.
“Wow, that’s gonna take a bit to get used to....”
She paused again as she approached a red light, replaying events of her life in her mind as she watched pedestrians cross the street.
She eyed what seemed to be a brother and sister trailing their parents, a bittersweet smile forming on her lips as she thought of her own brother she had grown so distant from.
“I need to fix this...” she whispered, gripping the steering wheel tighter.
“I need to end this stupid feud, I need to move on already.” she felt the tears starting to fall,
“I can’t have you live your life not knowing your uncle because your mother is stupid and doesn’t know how to let go of a grudge.”
She wiped away the tears, stepping on the gas as the light changed to green,
“Now I need to do something I’ve been putting off for a long time. I need to tell Takado how I really see him...”
She pulled in her driveway, cursing under her breath immediately after seeing her fiance’s car in the driveway.
“Oh god I hope he hasn’t already put out a missing person's report...” she whispered, realizing she hadn’t checked her phone the entire time she’d been out.
“Fifteen calls Spikes!” Vincent yelled as she opened the front door, dropping her phone before she could check it.
“Vince, I can explain...” she responded shakily, his hands now gripping her arms, the concern on his face making it seem like she had been gone for days.
“Where were you?! Kitty said you said you were going home to take a bath when she had last seen you, 6 hours ago!” his voice was slightly cracking.
“I was so worried about-”
“I’m pregnant!” Spikes shouted abruptly, inhaling sharply and biting her lip as she stared at him wide eyed.
“What...” His voice barely a whisper.
“I-We’re having a baby...” Spikes whispered, a smile creeping across her lips as her fiance stared at her with nothing but pure joy in his eyes.
“We’re going to be parents.”
her voice was shaking and her knees felt weak.
“I-I’m gonna be a dad...?” Vince’s eyes began to well with tears as he crouched down, eye level with her lower abdomen, he looked up at her as she nodded softly.
“A-and you’re s-sure this is what you want?” his voice cracked as a tear slid down his face.
Spikes crouched down in front of him, cupping his face softly, wiping away his tears.
“Yes, I’m terrified out of my mind, and probably am going to have many freak outs over the next few months, but Vince, I love you. I may not feel ready right now, but I’m in, we’re going to be parents love!” she smiled through tears, resting her forehead against his.
He quickly slumped down and rested his head on her lap, nuzzling his nose against her stomach.
“I’m gonna be a dad.” he smile wrapping his arms around her waist as he continued to cuddle her stomach. He kissed her stomach before getting up and helping her to her feet.
“Where are you going?” Spikes questioned tilting her head as Vince made his way to the kitchen.
“Gotta call my mom!” he yelled happily, picking up the phone.
“Wait! Can’t we just announce it at the reception?” Spikes wined running into the kitchen.
“Don’t you take this from me!” Vince practically hissed as he put his hand over the phone.
“Well, there’s no question who’s most excited about this.” she giggled watching him enthusiastically tell the good news to his mother. She smiled, putting her hand over her stomach,
“I’m gonna be a mom.”
...
“So...I’m not going to beat around the bush.” Spikes said softly as she stared at her brother who sat across from her.
“I wanted to tell you in person,” she gripped her fiance’s hand, thankfull his bones could withstand her strength,
“I’m having Blade walk me down the aisle.” she attempted to steady her breath and appear confident in her decision.
“What?” Takado spat, chuckling in disbelief.
“I don’t think you should be laughing hun...” Kitty whispered as she watched Spikes’ anger rise.
“It’s not a joke Takado, I already talked to Blade. I’m sorry that it took me this long to make this decision.” the dogs voice was stern, she was trying to do anything she could to prevent a full on fight.
Takado’s smile faded as he locked eyes with his sister, his brows furrowing into a glare, shaking his head.
“Really Carissa? You’re pulling this shit now?” he growled lowly.
“Takado!” Kitty hissed at her husband,
“At least let her explain why!”
“There is no reason, this is just what she does, she needs a reason for chaos.” Takado growled focused on Spikes.
“Taka-” Kitty was cut off by Spikes’ bark.
“I just can’t handle this shit anymore! Okay?” Spikes snarled glaring at her brother.
“Since you came back, it’s been completely different, and I’m tired of hating you and myself for how distant we are now!"
Spikes could feel her body starting to shake as her anger built.
Kitty bit her lip as she listened to Spikes’ outburst, she could see the tension rising between the siblings as both of them glared across the coffee table at the other.
“Spikes, I just don’t understand why the distance is such a huge deal...I mean, I understand being upset, but holding a grudge for eight years-”
she was cut off by a bark that seemed to be more of a cry.
“It's like if your Dad came back and was more interested in a woman than you.”
“As long as he still loved and spent time with me I wouldn't care. It's selfish to expect to be the center of his world for all eternity.” Kitty shouted, desperately looking for any sign of getting through the dogs head.
"And why even mention that? Takado isn't your father!"
“But that’s the thing, he is!” Spikes whimpered as she looked up at the cat, her eyes filled with defeat. “Maybe not biologically, but he is the only thing I’ve ever known to be a father.”
she looked over at her brother, eyes pleading for his understanding,
“I know I’m stupid for this, but the day he died is the day I lost my father, and when he finally came back, I was meeting my brother for the first time.”
tears streamed down her face as she began to curl forward into her legs.
Takado sat stunned, eyes wide and mouth gaping. He had always known that his relationship with his sister wasn’t normal, that one day he would have to teach her how a brother and sister should interact.
It had been so long though, surely she didn’t need him holding her hand through it and teaching her as an adult.
“What the fuck do you want from me Carissa?” Takado howled as he jumped out of his seat.
“Do you want me to abandon my son and so I can go baby you?”
He was snarling as he growled down at his cowering sister.
“I have done fucking everything I thought you wanted. I thought you wanted your brother but apparently you wanted a fucking daddy to take care of you and fucking take responsibility for you.” his voice echoed through the room as everyone fell silent.
Kitty quickly looked at Spikes whose face was sheet white, as though he had physically removed her heart from her chest. She began to hiss as she stood to face her husband but was cut off by a jaguar like growl from behind her.
“That is fucking enough!” Vincent growled as he stood in front of Spikes, eyes nearly white and pupils slit.
Kitty slowly backed over to the couch Spikes was curled up on, wrapping her arms around the shivering canines shoulders.
“Don’t you EVER speak to her like that!” he continued growling, eyes burning, locked on the canine in front of him. Takado stared wide eyed, taken back by the sudden outburst from the usually quiet man.
“This doesn’t involve-” Takado began to argue, but was quickly cut off by Vincent’s hiss.
“Doesn’t involve me? Are you fucking kidding me! Are you so chalked full of pride and anger that you can’t see how much progress she just made!” his fists were clenched and his body shaking, for the first time since they had all met him, he was livid.
“Progress? You call this progress?” Takado snarled back in defense.
“You are so fucking stupid.” Vincent laughed, “You are so focused on your anger right now, that you can’t see just how hard this is for her! You talk about maturity and growing up, but look at you!”
Takado stood shaking with rage as the feline spoke,
“And you wonder why she doesn’t want you to walk her down the aisle.” His words were as cold as his eyes, but he didn’t care. He had managed to stay quiet this long, but Takado had taken it too far.
Takado snarled and flipped the coffee table out of his way as he charged Vincent, grabbing the slightly shorter man by the front of his shirt bringing their faces mere inches apart.
“I’m warning you Vince...Back down, now!” his glowing jade eyes locked with Vincent’s glowing white.
“This is between Carissa and me, I don’t care how loud I get or how much I scare her-”
He was cut off again as he felt his body start to feel weak,
“What the fuck...” he muttered looking away from the feline only for a moment and regaining his strength.
“Takado, you may be bigger than, hell you are stronger than me, but I swear to you I will fight you until my dying breath to protect my mate and my child!” his voice was low as he quickly shoved Takado away.
The entire room went silent again, Spikes stared wide eyed at her soon to be husband as his words seemed to echo throughout the room.
Kitty let go of Spikes instantly, moving back to stare at her, eyes drifting down to her stomach and back up to her eyes that were focused on Vince.
“Wha- What did you just...” Takado stuttered as he took a step back.
“You heard me Takado.” Vincent hissed, eyes still glowing and fixed on the canine. Takado fell back in the couch and stared up at Vince, searching for words.
“Do you get it? Do you see now why you both need to move on from this? Spikes has finally met you half way on this. She finally opened up to you and made progress, and all you can do is yell at her? I’m done sitting off to the side and keeping my mouth shut Takado!”
His eyes slowly going back to their ice blue as he took a seat beside Spikes who still was staring at him.
“I know that Spikes is different, I know she can’t figure things out the same way you and I can, but she’s trying.” he smiled softly at her,
“And you need to try too, okay?”
His voice was calm again as he directed his attention back to Takado who sat there flabbergasted.
“YOU’RE PREGNANT?!?!?!?!” Kitty finally screeched causing everyone to jump.
“I-um-I..” Spikes stuttered as she scooted closer to Vince.
“Why did you have to bring that up!?!” she barked as she looked up at her mate, trying to hide from her best friend.
“What do you mean why would he bring that up??? Why wouldn’t he!?!?” Kitty shouted, trying to get the dog’s attention. “How far along are you??? When did you find out??? Why didn’t you tell us??? Why didn’t you tell me the other day when I made that joke??? Is that why you were freaking out so much???”
“We just found out Kitty, and in Spikes’ defense she wanted to wait and announce it at the reception.” Vince said calmly as he put his arm around Spikes who seemed to still be shaking.
“Well you still should of told us before then.” Kitty pouted.
“Like you’re one to talk!” Spikes barked sticking her tongue out at the feline.
“Shut up I had a good reason for that!” Kitty playfully argued, she looked back at her husband who’s face was still sheet white.
“Hey Tako...don’t you have anything to say?” she asked still slightly upset with him.
“I-I...” Takado stumbled over his words as he stared at his sister.
“Can I please have a moment alone to speak with my sister?” He asked softly. Kitty straightened her posture slightly as she looked at Vince who began to open his mouth to speak.
“It’s fine Vince.” Spikes’ voice was soft as she put her hand on his knee,
“He’s not going to do anything, he’s calm now.”
She turned to Kitty who still seemed a bit uneasy.
“Seriously guys, its fine, just give us a bit. You should go check on the little one, make sure he didn’t wake up.” Spikes smiled as Vince nodded as kissed her forehead.
“Good idea, if he starts to say anything stupid just yell.” Kitty smiled as she patted the dog’s head. Spikes watched the two leave before turning to face her brother, she could see the conflict in his eyes as they locked on her lower abdomen.
“So...” she managed to speak, causing his head to snap forward focusing on her eyes.
“Sorry, it’s just..” he paused looking back at her stomach.
“Yeah...I know.” she couldn’t help but smile as she put her hand on her stomach,
“It’s insane, terrifying, and exciting all at the same time.”
“That’s parenthood.” Takado chuckled shortly before clearing his throat.
“Look, what I said earlier, I was out of line to snap-”
“You were right though.” Spikes’ voice was barely above a whisper as she stared at him.
“I don’t expect you to baby me, I can’t expect you to be my father...I know it’s ridiculous that I even still view you as my dad, but I don’t know anything else.”
Her voice was cracking as she broke eye contact.
“Carissa...I know you don’t, but you can’t put that on me.” he paused as he saw the tears starting to stream down her face.
“I don’t mean to put it on you, I don’t ever view it as your fault; you, we, were both forced into a situation we had no control over; and you did the best you could for me.” she ran her hands across her eyes trying to wipe the tears,
“I just don’t know how to move on from you when you are still here in front of me. I don’t know how to just forget that you were the closest thing to a father I’ve ever had.”
“You...You don’t have to forget Carissa. I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you, I didn’t know the first thing about being a father, I had to try to be brother and father at the same time and somehow the line between the two faded.”
He felt his own voice cracking as he spoke, trying to keep composure.
“And then you were left alone as quickly as I was, and you were even younger when you lost your everything.” he felt a tear run down his face,
“I can only imagine you were just as terrified as I was when I lost Mother. I know how hard it is to lose your everything, and I’m sorry Carissa. I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough, I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect you, I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect our Mother.”
He brought his hand to his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose, trying to hide the tears.
“I thought though when I came back that you would have been over it by then, it didn’t even cross my mind that you would still look at me that way...I didn’t realize just how much damage was done, and I don’t know how to fix it this many years later.” he shook his head in defeat.
Spikes stared at him through tear filled eyes as she watched him cry. This man she had always held so high, believed to be so strong, crying for the first time in front of her.
“That’s apart of the reason I wanted Blade to walk me down the aisle.” she attempted to keep her voice strong as she watched her brother continue to break in front of her.
“Blade was my first mother, and she still treats me like I’m her pup. I don’t want to continue living with this fucked up daddy issue with you.
I want my brother, I want to know what it means to have a brother...And maybe my brother shouldn’t be the one to walk me.” She held her breath as she waited for his reaction.
“Maybe that would be best...” Takado responded softly.
“I just hate that it’s come to this, I didn’t want this to be where we would end up. I only wanted what’s best for you...”
“Well now all that matters is what’s best for my baby, I can’t be a child and hold onto this anymore. I have to deal with the fact that I’m a legit orphan, I’ve never had a father or mother, I don’t know how those are supposed to act.
But, maybe because I don’t know, I’ll be a good mother...maybe with no wrong or even a right example, I won’t fuck up...right?” She looked up at him with doe like eyes.
“You aren’t going to be alone, Vince is going to be an amazing dad and there with you the entire way.You’ll figure it out Rissa.” Takado smiled reassuringly, getting up and taking a seat next to her.
“And remember Kitty and I can always babysit if you ever need a break.” He put his arm around her, pulling her into a hug,
“Just take it one step at a time and don’t forget to breath.” Spikes smiled hugging him back, pulling away and wiping her tears again.
“I’ll try.” she shifted in her seat hesitantly,
“Can I have some coffee?” she looked over at him with a small grin on her face. Takado shook his head and picked up a magazine that had fallen on the floor from him flipping the table.
“Bad Rissa!” he said sternly before softly swatting her on the head with the magazine.
“What the fuck?!” she hollered scrunching her nose in a dog like manner.
“Coffee’s bad for your baby.” he chuckled patting her head.
“And this mess is bad for your health.” She laughed getting off the couch looking at the mess from the table.
“I’ll help you clean it before your wife puts you back in your grave.” she joked getting a burst of laughter from her brother as he started to clean up.
“Is everything okay?!” Vince yelled as he ran into the room with Kitty right behind him,
“I thought I heard-” He stopped abruptly as he saw the two nearly in tears laughing on the floor.
“Oh, you’re cleaning, good. I won’t have to kill you.” Kitty smiled sweetly as she entered the room causing the two canines to laugh even harder.
“Did I miss something?” she questioned as she looked up at at her brother standing beside her.
“Yes, we both did.” He smiled watching the two attempting to catch their breath but continuing to laugh each time their eyes met,
“But maybe it's a good thing, can you remember the last time you saw these two this happy around each other?” Kitty smiled softly as she watched the siblings interacting like siblings for the first time in what seemed like years.
“No, I can’t.” she smiled again,
“You’re right.”
...
“And who gives away this woman?” The officiary spoke happily.
“I do.” Blade responded nervously. She turned to Spikes and kissed her cheek before hugging her tightly.
“Just breath pup, this is a happy day.” she whispered in the canine's ear, feeling her body shaking.
“Thank you.” Spikes whispered back before slowly taking her place next to her fiance. Vince stared wide eyed at his bride, a lump already forming in his throat. He reached over and softly gripped her hand in attempt to calm her nerves.
“Are you ready?” the officiary asked softly, smiling at Spikes. The canine looked up at her fiance who had a grin plastered on his face and she couldn’t help but smile.
She turned back to the officiary, and nodded softly. He smiled again, before clearing his throat to start the ceremony.
“Family, friends, we are gathered here today to witness and celebrate not what is happening but what already is, the love between Carissa and Vincent. We join them as they take the next step in their life together, becoming husband and wife.”
Spikes gripped her mates hand and looked up at him, smiling weakly, knees shaking as she listened.
“True marriage, however, begins far before the wedding day and the efforts of marriage continue well after the ceremony’s end.
In the time I’ve had to get to know them, I’ve come to understand that this is more than just the joining of two people. This is the celebration of an already unbreakable bond they have formed over years of love and support.” he smiled as the two faced each other.
“Now, the bride and groom have prepared their vows.”
“May I go first?” Vincent asked, noticing just how nervous his bride was. Spikes smiled up at him and nodded, grabbing his other shaking hand.
“From the first day my eyes fell upon you, I knew I needed to have you in my life.” he started, trying to keep his voice steady.
“And even though I helped fate with our meeting, timing perfectly to have you spill your coffee all over me,” he paused chuckling, getting a giggle from his mate.
“I wouldn’t change it for the world." He stared at her glowing eyes that seemed to be welling with tears.
“You’ve helped me in ways you probably don’t even realize, which makes me do the impossible and love you even more than I thought I could.
You’ve given me the gift of family and unconditional love. In return I can only give you what you see before you, and a promise.” he turned to his side where Damon sat with a ring hooked on his collar.
His hands continued to shake as he turned Spikes, her left hand in his right.
“With this ring comes my promise,” he slowly slid the ring on her finger, barely trying to stop the tears that began to fall down his face,
“to kiss you every day, goodmorning and good night.”
Spikes reached up and wiped away his tears with her right hand, attempting to suppress her own sobs through her smile.
“I promise to always tell you I love you, even after a fight. I promise to always be the ears that listen and the arms that hold you.
Regardless of how stubborn you may be, I promise I will always protect you. And above all else,” he held both her hands in his as he locked eyes with her, smiling at how beautiful she was in that moment.
Eyes glossy, nose and cheeks flushed, but her small smile saying it all,
“I promise to love you, through the good, bad, best and worst moments of our lives as husband and wife.
I love you Carissa.” he said almost breathlessly.
“Wow...” Spikes whispered trying to keep the tears from falling, knowing there was no chance in saving her make up at this point. She inhaled deeply, closing her eyes, trying to calm her trembling form.
This was it, the day she never expected would come, and in a way she still didn’t feel ready. Her knees were shaking, heart racing.
-pip-
Spikes quickly opened her eyes, feeling a slight wetness on her nose. She lifted her head, and looked up at the sky, storm clouds forming.
-pip- -pip-
It started slow, but soon it was a steady pour of rain. She couldn’t help but smile, silently thanking Kitty for demanding canopies over the guests just in case. However, Spikes hadn’t thought that far for the alter.
“Oh my, did the weather report call for rain?” the officiary said hesitantly as he started signaling for people to start moving the canopy.
“Stop.” Spikes said softly, a smile forming across her lips.
“It’s fine,” she closed her eyes lifting her head feeling the rain lightly fall on her face, giving her a sudden sense of serenity,
“I love the rain.” she looked over, smiling at the officiarry who nodded back at her. She inhaled deeply again.
It’s okay, I don’t have to be alone anymore.
“If someone would have told me eight years ago that I would meet the man of my dreams and end up marrying him;” she started, smiling up at her fiance,
“well I would have probably drop kicked them.”
she laughed, getting a chuckle from Vince who nodded his head softly,
“But here I am, here we are, and I couldn’t be happier.” her tears started to fall, blending with the rain that ran down her pink cheeks.
“On this day, I give you everything I am, have been, and will be.” her voice was soft, but confident as she reached to Mystic who had the ring hooked on her collar.
She turned back to face Vincent, who was beaming with joy as she continued to speak.
“You found me when I was lost, you’ve stood by my side and dealt with all my insanity, and you are somehow still here.” she reached forward, holding both his hands in hers, her eyes focusing on his.
“Before you, I didn’t know what true love was, I didn’t believe in it; I was terrified of it; but you taught me, showed me what love is.
Through the countless fits I throw, break downs, and full on freak outs; you stayed and showed me I deserve to be happy.” her voice was becoming hoarse, this was the most honest she had been in years.
“Because of you I found my reason to believe in myself.” she slowly slid the ring on to his finger.
“I vow to show you at least half of the unconditional love you have shown me.
I vow to always take a breath and make sure I’m not just yelling because I’m decaffeinated, or any other stupid reason I yell.” she laughed lightly.
Her heart raced as she stared up into his ice blue eyes, filled with more happiness than she thought possible. She let her gaze fall down to her abdomen, causing her to grin.
“I vow to support and comfort you through whatever life throws our way.” Vince smiled, resisting the urge to put his hand on her stomach.
“And I will love you for the rest of our damn near eternal lives together.” her heart was pounding in her ear drum as she gripped his hands. “
I love you. Yesterday, today, and every tomorrow we will have together; I proudly take you as my husband.” She smiled, almost triumphantly, her eyes never leaving her mates.
“Do you, Vincent Caine, take Carissa, to be your wedded wife?”
“I do.” Vincent proclaimed proudly.
“And do you, Carissa Rovaine, take Vincent to be your wedded husband?” Spikes smiled up at her mate, her smile turning into her famous cocky grin, her confidence shining.
“Damn straight I do.” she grinned, her body now shaking with excitement. The officiary smiled and shook his head as he continued.
“By the powers vested in me, I now pronounce you Husband and Wife. You may now kiss your bride.”
Vince closed the space between them, grabbing her by the waist with one arm, bringing the other under her arm and supporting her back; nearly bringing them to a full embrace.
He pulled her form against his, sealing it with their lips meeting in the first of many kisses he would give his; finally; wife.
