Chapter 12: Angel

"Spikes it is just a birthday party. Don't you think you're being unreasonable?" Kitty groaned, lightly hitting her head against the wood counter.

"I don't want a birthday party Kitty. Just drop it." Spikes barked at the cat.

It had to be the fourth time they'd argued over Spikes's birthday that week though it was still a month away.

"But a birthday party would be fun. We could have our few friends over and eat cake and-"

"And I'm not interested." Spikes muttered under her breath. She ignored the rest of Kitty's speech as she continued to make breakfast for the two.

"Jinx!" Kitty squeaked with surprise as her cat jumped onto her lap.

"You know Damon wouldn't chase you so much if you left him alone right?"

Kitty laughed at the disgruntled mewing she received.

She glanced at Spikes in the corner of her eye, wondering for a moment if she should take her own advice.

"You like waffles right?" Spikes asked though she'd already started cooking.

Kitty nodded as she stroked Jinx's head.

"Would you at least tell me what you might want as a gift?"

"Money for Tattoos I guess?" Spikes shrugged her shoulders.

"I really don't want anything."

"Why are you so difficult?" Kitty whined, sticking out her tongue at the dog.

"Oh no." Spikes gasped dramatically.

"I'm so difficult with my not wanting you to spend money on something stupid, or frivolous gifts. How dare I."

Kitty glared at Spikes, sighing heavily.

"Don't be like that Spikes." Kitty traced circles in Jinx's fur as she thought over what she'd say.

"What if we just did something really small. Just close friends?"

"I don't know if you noticed, but our close friends are our only friends."

"Even better." Kitty smiled.

"Just you, me, Xander, Nadine, and maybe David. It'd be fun."

"Why is this such a big damn deal?" Spikes growled.

"It's just a stupid day, no reason to make such a big deal out of it."

"It's not stupid, it's your birthday." Kitty protested.

"Come on Spikes, how can you not want even a small celebration?"

"Try because I'm not a spoiled little bitch that's grown up her entire life with every frivolous thing imaginable?" Spikes snapped, slamming the pan on the table.

"What the fuck is your problem, Spikes?" Kitty hissed at the dog.

Spikes stared incredulously at the cat. She wondered if the cat truly didn't understand or was just trying to piss her off.

"My problem is that you won't shut up about this birthday crap, Kitty." Spikes shouted.

Kitty flinched away from Spikes before getting to her feet.

"Oh I'm sorry. Was I being too much of a pest trying to do something nice for you?"

"You're not being nice." Spikes screamed. She stepped in front of Kitty, blocking her path to the living room.

"You're pushing your views, what you want, on me without any consideration for what I want even though you swear it's for me."

"Well I'm sorry that I think my best friend's birth is something that should be celebrated." Kitty spat at her, taking a step back.

"Parties are so fucking childish, and honestly I thought you were more mature than this." Spikes rolled her eyes, stepping aside to continue.

"No, what's childish is being so fucking obsessed with the illusion of what it means to be an adult." Kitty hissed. She pushed past Spikes and ran out of the house.

Spikes sighed at the sound of rubber and pavement as Kitty drove away from the house.

She'd wanted the cat to shut up, not chase her off.

Damon whimpered and sat down beside her. He quietly leaned his head against her leg as her fingertips stroked the top of his head.

Spikes definitely hadn't meant to cause this of all things.

Jinx hissing at her before stalking out of the room only added to her guilt.

...

Kitty groaned loudly as she stared up at the setting sun.

It was going to be dark soon, and she'd forgotten a jacket as she always did.

She watched parents round up their children to take them home. She pulled her knees up to her chest.

She'd been thinking it over for hours and she still couldn't quite figure out why Spikes had gotten so angry.

Kitty knew she'd been pushy, but she'd done the same so many times before and had never received a reaction from Spikes like she had this time.

Kitty stood from the park bench and began walking down the street.

It was late, she was cold, but she wasn't ready to go home yet.

She wasn't ready to deal with Spikes yet.

For a moment she considered walking back to the park, getting in her car and driving to Nadine's house.

She shook her head, deciding it best to leave their old teacher out of their spat.

So Kitty just walked, letting her feet go where they may.

Her heart stopped when her feet did as she stood outside the cemetery.

Chills ran down her arms, and she took a step back. 

She wondered how she'd ended up here. She didn't even know how to get to the cemetery from the park.

She turned around quickly, taking five steps before turning to glance at the cemetery.

She hated cemeteries. She's hated them her entire life, and yet she stood before this one feeling inexplicably drawn inside.

She tried to ignore it.

Tried to walk away.

Instead she marched inside and straight to his tombstone.

"Do you know about how much of a pain in the ass your sister is?" Kitty shouted at Takado's grave.

"Was she always this infuriating, or is this a recent development?"

Kitty clenched her fists at her sides, once again holding back the sting of unshed tears.

She took a deep breath before crouching beside his grave as she'd seen Spikes do before.

"Hey Takado... Why does she hate her birthday so much?" Kitty sighed softly.

Kitty reached over, gingerly stroking the cold stone.

"I'm sorry for disturbing your rest."

Kitty's eyes widened as warm breeze brushed against her arm for a brief moment.

She stared at her arm, and then at the grave.

Kitty stood up, shivering from the cold and pushed the thought away.

There was no way a dead man was responding.

...

To Kitty's surprise she found herself at Takado's grave frequently after that night.

She was still afraid of the cemetery, and yet she felt the strangest sense of peace whenever she was by Takado's grave.

She'd sit beside his grave and just talk. About Spikes, her day, anything really. She told the stone slab everything.

For a while it helped. She felt calmer, more at peace with herself whenever she talked to it.

Then she thought of how Spikes might react if she knew Kitty would visit the grave.

Would Spikes be okay with someone who never knew him in his life visiting him so frequently.

Kitty couldn't imagine that ending well.

And yet, her heart ached at the thought of never coming to speak to this unknown man's grave.

...

"Kitty are you okay?" David chuckled at Kitty's eyes wide with surprise as the fell on him.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Kitty spoke quickly,

"Because you zone out when something's on your mind." David smiled at her as he leaned back in his seat.

"You always have."

Kitty stuck out her bottom lip, glancing away from David.

He was right though. She hadn't stopped thinking about her visits to Takado's grave.

"You can always talk to me, you know that." David offered and smiled sweetly at her.

"It's nothing just." Kitty inhaled deeply, turning in her seat. 

"I've been going to visit Spikes's brother's grave a lot lately and I just feel like maybe I shouldn't be there."

"Why shouldn't you be there? It's not as if you're vandalizing it right?"

"I would never." Kitty hissed defensively.

"Isn't it weird though? Me visiting and talking to the grave of someone I never knew?"

"You're going to fall if you sit like that."

"Will you shut up, and help me figure this out?"

"Okay your funeral." David chuckled. "Anyways, I really don't think it's weird. It think it's sweet you care about Spikes so much that you'd go visit her later brother so often."

"That's not it though." Kitty sighed, moving her elbow slightly.

She squeaked as her body turned and she hit her head on the tough wooden floor.

Kitty groaned as David laughed.

He reached out to help her, and laughed harder as she struggled to swat his hand away.

"So what do you mean by that isn't it?" David continued to chuckle slightly.

Kitty glared at him, straightening herself slightly.

"I mean I don't go there out of respect for Spikes. I go there because... I know it's just a piece of stone, but talking to it somehow helps me."

"Well that isn't that weird. You talk to Jinx the same way even though she's a cat, and can't understand, right?"

"Jinx understand me just fine, David. I am a cat myself you know." Kitty commented as if it were obvious.

"It is weird that Damon and I can understand each other though, considering he's a dog."

"Oh." David's cheeks flushed and he glanced at the ground.

"David what should I do about this grave thing?"

"I don't see it as a problem, but if it's bothering you so much I think you should stop going."

David reached over, resting his hand on her knee and smiled up at her.

"But I think you should go one more time. 

To explain.

And to say goodbye."

...

Kitty stood over his grave for a lone time. She didn't know what she should say or how she should say it. She didn't know what she should do.

She inhaled deeply twisting her fingers together and closed her eyes.

"Hey Takado," She finally spoke though her voice quivered.

"I guess I wanted to stop by to say... I won't be stopping by anymore."

Kitty sighed, tears filled her eyes as she struggled to speak.

She struggled to understand why her chest ached as she stood before the grave of a man she had never known.

"I've just... started to think that I'm overstepping my boundaries by coming to see you." Kitty forced herself to continue.

"I never knew you, so I'm just worried that Spikes wouldn't like me being here."

Lie.

Spikes wasn't the reason Kitty wanted to stop coming, and she knew it.

She turned to walk away, but instead sat down in front of his grave as she had so many times before now. 

It was just a slab of stone. That's what she told herself.

But just in case.

She owed him honesty.

"Takado... If you are there you deserve the truth." Kitty paused, twirling her hair in her hands.

"The truth is I'm scared... I don't understand why I feel so safe here, so at peace. I never knew you, I hate cemeteries, so why am I different here?"

A tear slipped from her eye and she quickly brushed it away.

"More than anything I don't understand why it's killing me to say good bye."

"You have a gentle soul, Katherine Caine." A woman spokes quietly from behind her. 

Kitty stood up and turned to face the stranger that knew her name.

Her eyes widened when she caught sight of her translucent form.

"Thank you for the kindness you've shown to my son."